Monday, September 12, 2005

I'm guessing he's playing me for a sucka

To my husband, who has perfected the "golly-gee-I-guess-I-can't-find-it-maybe-you-could-help-me" syndrome, also known as the "can't-find-my-ass-with-both-hands" technique, you had no problem finding that ham and cheese croissant I hid in the fridge last night behind the cottage cheese and beer.

The croissant that I thought about for 24 minutes before finally dragging my ass down the stairs to discover, to my dismay, that you suddenly can find missing items when it means the difference between eating Puffins cereal or the best croissant this side of the Eiffel.

You suck.

10 comments:

amy said...

Are you by any chance married to MY husband? God help you if you are.

Marel Lecone said...

I'm now craving a croissant! Thanks. :)

momma of 2 said...

Oh - don't you just HATE it when they do that? UGH? They can't find their shoes, the ones they took off and left by the door...yet they eat the good stuff that's 'hidden'... your mistake was hiding it behind the beer - next hide it behind the juice or veggies - they never check there.

Biscuit said...

and isn't it amazing that said "mystery item" is usually right in front of their face? I mean, RIGHT THERE! Open your eyes Mr. I-was-trained-by-a-supah-secret -organization!

Devon said...

heehee.. I found your blog through Purpose Driven Life. Pretty funny! It sounds like something my husband would do, too. And I read the post about your son eating the sand- I waited and waited, too! Until my then baby son puked it all back up! They love sand!
Anyway, just thought I would comment!

Martin said...

That man is an idol of mine, not that I dislike Puffins cereal.

Christa said...

What is it with men? My hubby had to learn the hard way that if he so much as glances in the direction of, say, that last handful of M&M's.... somebody gonna get hurt. And yeah, like it's really easier to ask wife, a.k.a. "I keep a running inventory of where every bill, every stamp, every hammer, every single itty bitty item in this house is so go ahead and ask me where it is because I'm sure I know", and then they get mad when you tel them where it is, they look, can't find it, you go to exactly where you said it wa and THERE IT IS. It's like F'in magic.

Jaime said...

THAT IS THE WORST! :( I hate looking forward to eating something and then not getting it. And my husband is the exact same way, btw. It drives me nuts. He can't stand to look for anything.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

oh..he may have to be kicked out for that..It totally sucks when you look forward to something..then find out the hubby got a hold it first...fuckers anyway

Caryn said...

I totally could have written that same exact thing!!! Tim and I have such different diets--until I'm counting on something. Then I find out he finished it and a) Didn't replace it or b) Didn't let me know so I would either be prepared or replace it myself. His sister told me his unspoken motto when they were growing up was "What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine, too." He's by no means selfish. I am certainly entitled to eat his disgusting food. But it in no way appeals to me.