Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to 'ho I go

Idaho, that is.

We are going for 10 days and I have been looking forward to this for 6 months. It will give me lots of time to reflect on recent accusations that my blog has been "pedestrian" and "mundane." She also said some other things that I can't remember because I couldn't believe, coming off the tongue post, that either word describes my writing of late.

S: You know, the tongue thing is really no big deal because I am from the south and people from the south eat tongue all the time.
K: Yeah, I don't think you should be verbalizing that with what appears to be pride, if you know what I mean.

She would rather hear salacious gossip or politics gone awry. Since it comes from someone who is almost family (and she just realized at the age of 43 that one person in a relationship is always more in love than the other person at any given time and that maybe her problem in relationships is that she is ALWAYS the person who loves less), I will ponder the possibility of embracing the undercover reporter in me...

Everyone be cool and safe and I'll see "all y'all" when I get back. Peach out! (ok, so I was typing Peace out and peach out appeared but I think it could be signatory).

The "shoes" I got at my pedicure today. I have been wearing them now for 5 hours. Derek proclaimed these the worst flip flops I have worn to date. If he had only seen me when I was 10. 

The words you never think you'll hear out of your husband's mouth

We were talking in bed last night about our impending vacation. Our yearly pilgrimage to our Mecca, aka Idaho. For all those of you who are cringing, don't think I haven't brought it up on occasion how creepy Idaho is.

I asked Derek why his sister is always discussing his digestive problems when we all get together. I mean, I have been with the man for 3 years and I have never really witnessed such problems. I cook stuff as hot as can be and never a complaint or reaction to my knowledge.

He said that every once in a while, something won't hit his stomach right. But doesn't that happen to everyone? He blamed it on his evil father who used to make him eat brain, stomach, tongue, liver, ect. But Evil FIL also was cruel enough to deny his children even the right to make a face when something tasted wicked bad (personally I think this is a good thing because there is nothing worse than a child who scrunches up his face and yells "EEEWWW" when asked to try something at the neighbors house).

We started to discuss how tongue looks when you see it in the supermarket. But this is the point of the conversation when everything went south...

D: You know, after reading the Lewis and Clark journals, where they talk about how much they looked forward to shooting a buffalo so they could eat it's tongue, I'm starting to think I might be missing something. Maybe tongue just needs to be fresh.
K: So what does that mean? If we went out and found a beef (yes, this is what I said) and cut his tongue out while he was still alive and ate it, it would be good?
D: Maybe.
K: I am SO blogging this tomorrow.

Paris is a thief

So I was watching Pretty In Pink this morning when I was on the treadmill with the baby. On the treadmill with the baby because God forbid he just fall asleep in his swing BESIDE the treadmill. So, as I was lugging a 17lb. baby, I came across a startling discovery.

"That's hot" or "It's hot,"Paris Hilton's signature phrases, were stolen.

Molly Ringwald beat her to it. Remember when Blane comes into Trax to pick up Andie and he asks her opinion about a Steve Lawrence album.

Her response..."It's hot. White hot." Same pouty lips, same dropped jaw on the last syllable.

I'm stunned. She was 5 years old when this movie came out. At this moment, Abnormal is thinking that the fact that I am stunned is stunning itself because it is Paris Hilton after all.

Poor Molly Ringwald.

Because a huge celebration for my mother wasn't enough...

we had a big rite of passage tonight at Chateau Cookie.

E finally realized that Zinni will always pay attention to him if he is covered in cereal that is a paste-like consistency and, when dried, makes him look like a breaded baby, ready for a fryer.

And Zinni realized that the baby will let Zinni lick him from head to toe when Mom and Dad are in the kitchen, arguing about the nutritional value of rice vs. oatmeal cereal.

But if the dog eats all the cereal on the baby, then mommy doesn't have to spend as much time cleaning the baby.

It is a good thing.