1. When your father-in-law is moaning about the price of gas at $2.29 a gallon and his little yellow light on the dashboard is on, don't say "isn't $2.29 cheaper than a tow truck?"
2. In the middle of dinner when your father-in-law continues to fill up your husband's glass with red wine, don't say "you probably should stop doing that because you might need a part of his liver some day."
3. Do not follow your in-laws into their hotel room 2 minutes behind them without knocking on the door, even if they know you are coming. You may find your father-in-law climbing into his bed. If you do, do not (and I cannot stress this enough) shriek loudly and go running from the room. We're all adults, for heaven's sake.
4. Do not cover your ears and start humming when the discussion goes south and suddenly you are in mixed company with your mother-in-law discussing the conceiving of your husband. There is no song loud enough to drown out the phrase, "and I was so horny I borrowed money and took a train across country to meet Derek's father." I know they did it at least once, and I am VERY glad for them, but I really don't need to hear about it.
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7 comments:
The fear of accidentally seeing my father-in-law climb into bed with his plumber-butt exposed is one of the things that keeps me single. I have In-Law-Rear-Fear.
NO STUFFING?????
There was plenty of alcohol flowing at my in laws over the weekend, too. And on more than one occasion, I found myself saying, "I so reeeeeally did not need to hear that".
Mmm...holidays with the in laws. I've had my fill, thanks. I'm saying ~when~.
AAACK!
Happy late Thanksgiving!!
~L.
It's my own parents that usually pull this crap on me! And trust me, if there is one thing worse then your in-laws discussing the conception of your husband, it's your parents talking about how they got together to make you! Yikes!
I and my 4 sibilings are here due to immaculate conception...same with my hubby and his brother - they were also conceived via immaculate conception...my parents nor the in-laws never had sex...LALALALA...(running away with hands over ears....)
Hilarious!!!
I know it may have been painful for you when it all happened but that was some funny stuff...;)
Thanks for the laugh this morning! :)
You had me at #1. Too funny. You and the in-laws . . . that must be the biggest riot. I'm so glad that you guys are so in love--since that is the only way to survive the in-laws, right? :)
OMG - LMAO as usual when you discuss your inlaws. You had a fabulous point on #1. (Well, all really)
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