Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Mute! There's a mute button, right?

My son has developed righteous indignation. Righteous indignation equal to that of a Southern Baptist minister who has just found out that instead of going to the mall, the youth group went to see Dirty Dancing, and now the youth minister's daughter is pregnant, and we told you that dancing would lead to this, and I don't care what you say, Marelle, that baby's sunken eyes, just because she had sunken eyes, didn't look anything like my boyfriend's sunken eyes.

The latest outlet for the boy's indignation? How his evil mother who has blatantly ignored him for twenty minutes as she attempted to make chocolate chip cookies would then DENY HIM the right to the 14 ounce package of chocolate-covered expresso beans that he so faithfully and laboreously freed from their captivity and was speedily piling on the floor between his legs while occasionally snacking on a couple. You would have thought I pulled all 10 of his teeth right out of his head with a pair of plyers. I couldn't even hear myself think.

E: WWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
K: (frantically scooping the beans off the floor with one hand and yanking the beans already in his mouth with the other hand) NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
E: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (trying to hide the beans under his legs while frantically chew, chew, chewing when he actually stopped to breathe).
K: These are for MOM and they are only for emergency purposes. Do you know that one time Mom ate 4 of these and managed to stay up for 20 hours straight.
E: WWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
K: In baby world, 4 beans is like 40 and that would make it ........................ (realizing that math was never my forte) staying up a long time!
E: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Lord have mercy. I'm buying this kid a "Drama Queen" t-shirt.

7 comments:

Corona Red said...

Wow -- he must keep you on your toes. He just wants to be like Mom! ;)

Martin said...

I've never seen Dirty Dancing. Is that how I get to impregnate the youth minister's daughter?

missbhavens said...

You're never too young for rightious indignation...

...but he's WAY too young for chocolate covered espresso beans...

PBS said...

Ha ha, they can certainly BELLOW when thwarted! But chocolate and coffee would not have been a good snack for him!

Biscuit said...

Ohhhh, fun for you! Nothing more fun than a hopped up small child!

Marel Lecone said...

And, you're talking in third person. What the hell is going on? Great post, Girlie. And, I so knew where you were going with the whole Dirty Dancing thing. Although I thought you always agreed with me . . . :)

amy said...

I loved the Southern Baptist comment ... so true!