Thursday, March 23, 2006

The anatomy of a "Bad Bet"

K: He is so going to throw up in my hair while I am asleep tonight.
D: No, he's not.
K: I'll bet he will.
D: Double or nothing (referencing an outstanding debt that continues to grow, because, I'm an idiot).
K: Double or nothing he vomits in my hair tonight.

(sideline: flash to Beautiful Girls)
Paul: I can't find Jan (his ex). I'll bet she's with that meatcutter Victor.
Birdie: She's not with Victor.
Paul: I'll bet you $20 she's with Victor.
Kev: Bad bet.
Paul: What do you mean, "bad bet?"
Kev: It's a bad bet. If you are right, she is with Victor. If you are wrong, you gotta pay $20. Either way you lose. Bad bet.

D: But I want to be clear about the vomit in the hair.
K: What are you talking about? you want to decide what actually constitutes vomit in my hair?
D: Yeah, what if he just vomits and some splashes up on one piece of your hair. I'm not paying $80 for vomit on one piece of hair.
K: I think any vomit, even if only on one strand of hair, is payable.
D: I don't think so.
K: So if I lie in bed beside you, with one strand of hair with vomit on it, and decide not to take a shower, you'll be OK. Just lying beside me, knowing that there is vomit in a strand of my hair, yet not knowing exactly WHICH piece of hair is foul?
D: OK, I'll pay up for one strand.

Of the 11 times he has vomited on me in two days, you think the kid could have been nice enough to do it so I could get $80. I am SO getting him back when he turns 15.


Biscuit said...

What an uncooperative child you have there! Har!

Jenell said...

I got vomit in my hair by laying on the couch with the sick baby on my chest. It won't ensure results, but at least the vomit will point upwards toward your face.

Good luck with that.

Marel Lecone said...

I'm still going to comment the same way I was originally going to comment even though D saw the light.

"I think any vomit, even if only on one strand of hair, is payable."

Kristen is so right on this one.

Pay up, Dude!

Yes, bad debt but it would have been nice to be compensated so nicely, I think. :)