There is nothing better than being I.D.'d on a trip to the supermarket.
"You want to see my I.D.? That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day."
Until you forget your I.D. at home, you are at the liquor store because it will fit into the 7 seconds available today and you are getting ready for a party of 50 to celebrate your friends getting engaged.
Clerk: Can I see I.D.?
K: (while searching through the wallet) Uh, no. I don't have it.
C: Well I can't sell you anything if you don't have I.D.
You can only imagine how ugly this is about to get.
K: Isn't it your policy to I.D. under 30?
C: That's why I'm I.D.-ing you.
K: I am (insert age that passed 30). I was born in (insert year that is not 1976).
C: (with a head shake) Well you look under 30 to me.
K: Uh, yeah, no I don't.
C: You do to me.
K: Let's try a little realism then. Do you think I look under 21?
C: I think you look under 30.
K: Last time I checked, I have to be over 21. My I.D. isn't to prove that I am over 30.
C: Well once I ask, I can't sell unless you show me I.D.
K: You are joking right. Cause there couldn't be anything more asinine than not letting me purchase ORANGE VODKA and HYPNOTIQ because you think I might be under 30. Not that I'm under 21, but under 30. It's not like I'm buying a case of Busch Light Draft and I'm paying with change. I'm buying the ingredients for a Reserve Red Ruby Martini. That I am serving at an engagement party for 50.
I haven't been this mad since they cancelled "V" What a bitch.